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About Literature / Hobbyist VariableNatureMale/United States Group :iconlibertasoct: LibertasOCT
 
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So....it's been a while since I made a journal entry.

Straight to the point: A while ago I joined the second season of :icononce-dead-oct: and used a character I haven't even touched since High School, Lori Nedalph.

I really like Lori. She was one of the first characters that I seriously tried to write something with, even if it did end up as a collosial failure. And with the new season of Once Dead, I figured that this would be the perfect time to re-use her.

So I bring Lori out of "retirement", change a few things about her (most notably changing her ethnicity), fleshed out her backstory a bit more, and then shipped her off to compete.

That's where I got stuck.

See, in the first season of Once Dead, the character I used, Amy Tolson, was one I had actually worked on for a bit, but just hadn't WRITTEN stuff for in a long time. But for this one, I just couldn't really determine her personality as quickly as I wanted. Sure I was able to sneak by the first round, but I just had trouble really CONNECTING with Lori, figuring out her voice, etc. etc.

Plus, having to change what personality I knew she had after getting her memories/abilities stolen by Veronica? Kind of a MAJOR wrench in the works.

The long and short of it is that I fucked up. I fucked up HARD. I procrastinated. I put off writing. Even when I tried to write, I threw it out because it wasn't "good enough", even though I knew the deadline was looming. I thought that I could just slam something out at the last minute, like I've often done in these OCT's, and it would be enough to make something happen.

I was wrong. Instead, I've let myself down and shown that I'm just kind of narcissistic and over-estimating my own abilities.

I'd like to take this moment to apologize to some people:

To the judges of :icononce-dead-oct:

:iconcrazyshiro: :iconburoe: :iconaegypius-x: :iconwithaquillinmyhand: and :icondeadberry:

I apologize to you all for not performing in my duties as a competitor in an OCT. I wish I could blame some sinister external force that prevented me from writing, but it was just me. I accept that I will be disqualified and eliminated because of this.

To my opponent :iconanthropomorchicanin:

I wish you the best of luck in future rounds, and can't wait to see what you write. I'm sorry I couldn't come up with something in time.

And to anyone, be they a part of the Once Dead community (for lack of a better word), or just someone who happens to like what I read:

I'm sorry I let you down.

There is, however, one last thing I CAN submit, if you guys want. While I was certainly procrastinating on this round, I did have a rough idea for what I wanted the overall story of my submissions to be, my meta-plot if you will. I'll probably give a VERY abbreviated version of that and post it up here, so if anyone was interested in seeing what I wanted to do, and maybe wants to shamelessly steal it, I can post it this Friday.

I wish everyone the best of luck!

VN out
  • Mood: Shame
  • Listening to: Rock Music
  • Reading: Saga
  • Watching: Various Anime
  • Playing: haven't played video games in a while
  • Eating: Food
  • Drinking: Water

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Good morning freaks, freakettes, and freaks-in-between.

Lori woke up with a shock. It wasn’t even sunrise yet. The hell does this FUCKING BITCH think she is doing? Lori thought bitterly. She didn’t even pay attention to the rest of Veronica’s abrupt and rude call-to-arms, but the introduction of some minor earthquakes re-focused her.

She ran out of the house, barely dressed, wondering what was going on, and saw the two towers that had apparently spontaneously appeared, just standing out in the open as if since time immemorable. One seemed to be on fire, but only on the edges and never fully consumed, while the second looked like a bunch of ruins, barely held together.

Pick a tower, fuckers, and get your page from the book!” Whatever intercom Veronica was using shut off, leaving Lori and the rest of the Hotel’s residents confused. Page? Book? What the hell was she talking about? And where the hell did these towers come from?

Lori was NOT in the mood for this level of bullshit, especially this early in the morning. Veronica wasn’t the Old Duck, she wasn’t Lori’s superior in the Blue Tigers, and Lori was DAMN SURE that she was going to get answers.

She rushed back into her bungalow and picked up Inferno, kicking aside the tools from last night. What the hell had she been thinking, trying to figure out how something like that worked? She wasn’t some sort of brainiac, she was just damn good at shooting.

Lori grabbed Inferno and raced out, knocking over one or two unluckier, smaller guests of the hotel. “Out of my way! MOVE IT!” She was going to finish this round, get whatever the hell sort of “page” she needed, and then finally talk to Veronica. She ran towards the closest tower, the one that looked like shabby ruins, and kicked down the door.

The interior was a crumbling mess, with vines and spiders crawling up the walls and across the ceiling. It seemed to be a single, long hallway, with a large pit that seemed to go down forever around the middle. Lori saw a tall man in some sort of khaki outfit, complete with a ridiculous hat and a whip. “Hey!” she shouted, getting his attention. It was Jon, one of the people managing the tournament. She didn’t see any of his dogs, which stood out as quite odd to her, but she let it slide. “What the hell is going on?”

“Fuck if I know,” he answered. “These towers just showed up out of nowhere. And Veronica just headed upstairs like the bitch she is, dressed like some general.” That raised Lori’s anger to even higher levels. Some general? What, like she was in the military? How dare she? How dare—

“Yo! Are you listening?” he shouted, snapping Lori out of her daze. She shrugged, then turned around at the sounds of several dogs barking. One by one they ran past the both of them and leaped across the gap, safely landing on the other side. Jon nodded in approval, then used his whip to try and catch onto one of the sturdier-looking vines on the ceiling. When it did so, he walked slowly back, then ran forward, swinging across the gap.

As he landed, the vine broke free from the ceiling and fell into the chasm. Lori waited to hear a sound, anything that would make it clear that there was, in fact, a bottom to the void, but nothing came.

She grunted, lifted up Inferno, and with a mighty heave, chucked it across the gap to an unsuspecting Jon. Jon shouted in surprised, and ducked out of the way, letting the weapon clang to the ground. Lori, meanwhile, jogged further back on her side of the gap, paused, and entered into a run. At the very edge, she jumped as hard as she could, reaching out her arms to make it to the edge.

For a brief one-fourth of a second, she worried that she might not have actually made the jump, but her hands clasped onto the ledge, leaving her just barely hanging on. She methodically pulled herself up, and walked to her gun, making sure that it wasn’t too damaged by her toss.

“Are you crazy?” Jon asked. “You can’t give a guy warning next time?” His dogs growled at Lori, mimicking the disapproval they heard in his voice, but Lori simply shrugged.

“I had to get across somehow, didn’t I?” She lifted Inferno back up and headed up the stairs, stopping only briefly to see that some other competitors had entered the tower as well, and were trying to see how to cross the gap.

The second floor seemed innocuous, but as soon as Lori took a step out into the room in front of her, an arrow shot out from a hiding place, nearly going straight through her skull. She ducked down quickly and hid behind the entrance. Jon and his pack of dogs were quick behind her. “Great. Just freaking great, traps,” John muttered. “Do you have any idea how long this’ll take to—”

Lori didn’t want to know and didn’t care. She was done being patient. She pulled out the shield for Inferno, silently cursing the stupid weapons designers for not having the brains to put a freaking WAY FOR HER TO SEE, and fired in front of her. To the left, right, up, down, anywhere and everywhere there could be something, she spit out several hundred rounds of ammo, turning the tower from a wreck to a catastrophe and triggering the traps that laid in wait.

The dogs whimpered in fear and pain as the ringing in their ears refused to go away, and even Jon clasped his hands onto his ears from the noise. “WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY ABOUT WARNINGS?” he shouted.

“IF YOU WANTED TO ENTER FIRST, BE MY DAMN GUEST!” Lori shouted back, as she walked through the hallway to the stairs. She didn’t bother pulling back down the shield. She may be in a hurry, but she wasn’t going to just give up the safety she had without being damn sure she didn’t need it.

The third floor of the tower was, surprisingly, barren. Empty and dark, with what little light there was coming from the tiniest of windows. As Lori cautiously stepped forward, she saw no sign of anyone, or anything. Not even the spiders from before seemed to want to venture here.

“Hello hewman!” Lori heard above her. She just barely had time to look up when she saw a manic-looking teenager, with pasty white skin and wearing a frilly black and white maid’s outfit, falling down onto her while holding two impossibly sharp knives in each hand. Lori backed out of the way, managing to not get hit. The mysterious girl giggled with pure joy as she tossed the knives at Lori, each one piercing through the shield and getting stuck halfway through.

Lori was speechless. How the hell….this shit is supposed to be bulletproof! ”Where’d ya get that cool gun, hewman?” The girl asked. “Can I have one tooooooooo?” she almost sang the request, humming to herself.

“I…you…absolutely not! What are you even DOING here? Who are you?!”

“Deadberry’s Deadberry, silly hewman!”

“Hey, gun girl, maybe you can----oh shit,” Jon said, as he walked into Lori and Deadberry’s confrontation. “Oh shit shit SHIT. Deadberry….Deadberry, what are you doing?”

“You KNOW this crazy bitch?” Lori was stunned.

“She’s….she’s kind of one of the judges,” Jon sheepishly admitted.

“That means Deadberry gets to KILL people! YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!” The girl jumped up and down, clapping her hands excitedly at the prospect of bloody murder.

Lori needed to get out of this room FAST. If Deadberry was strong enough to throw knives through bulletproof metal, she could easily kill Lori. A plan slowly formed in Lori’s mind. “I can think of SOME people you can’t kill,” Lori said, in a calculated, casual tone.

Deadberry, in response, almost teleported next to Lori and shoved another, larger knife into Inferno. The noises it made told Lori that now, the weapon was nearly busted. And now I’m screwed, Lori thought. She had no idea how to fix stuff that happened to Inferno, that was the tech peoples’ jobs.

“Why yewd say that mean stuff, hewman?” Deadberry asked.

“Because….because that’s what he told me earlier,” Lori hastily lied, pointing directly at Jon. “He was…was BRAGGING about how you couldn’t even squish an ant, how he could probably kill YOU easier than you could kill him!”

Jon froze in fear. Deadberry remained motionless for a few moments, then turned to face Jon. “Yew said all that mean stuff, hewman?”

“Deadberry, don’t listen to her. You CAN’T! Lori, what the fuck!”

Lori simply shrugged an apology and ran off to the stairs.

“So she’s….she’s LYING to Deadberry?” Deadberry turned to face Lori. “Yew lie to Deadberry?”

“I swear to you, Deadberry, I’m not!” But it seemed like Deadberry was no longer listening to her. Deadberry pulled out several knives, these almost qualifiying as machates, and slowly advanced towards her, with Deadberry’s previously smiling face now scowling.

“Lying’s bad! Lying to Deadberry is bad! Creator told me that Lying was bad, and Creator is good! EW ARE BAD HEWMAN!”

“Oh shut the fuck up,” Lori muttered, and pulled the trigger to Inferno, letting lose a hailstorm of bullets. The force blew away Deadberry’s legs, and Jon ran down the stairs for cover. Lori focused more and more and Deadberry, pumping in as much ammunition as she could until the gun ground to an ugly-sounding halt.

Somehow, Deadberry was still alive. Her body was a mangled mess of blood and guts, her bones shattered from the bullets, and her legs were in ten different places in the room. But she was still alive. And visibly healing.

Lori ran up the stairs.




“Ah, so we finally have an OH FUCK ME!” Veronica jumped back a bit as Lori pointed Inferno at her. “Put that shit down! Jesus! What is your fucking problem?!”

“The crazy bitch named Deadberry is my problem! Now where’s this ‘page’ and ‘book’ I’m supposed to find?”

“How about you find out on your fucking own?” Veronica taunted. Lori stepped closer with her weapon. “Nuh uh, back the fuck up.” Veronica raised her pistol. “You fucking try ANYTHING, and I will shoot you. If those knives can cut through your shield, I’m pretty fucking sure my gun can too. And you LOOK. LIKE. SHIIIIIIIIIT!” she continued. “Seriously, what happened, did you drag that thing out of the trash can? It looks more shit-faced than a alcoholic!”

Lori screamed and threw Inferno at Veronica. Surprised by the movement, she fired blindly, collapsing as the heavy Minigun fell on top of her. Lori hurried and grabbed the gun from the distracted Hotel manager, pointing the loaded weapon at the pseudo-general. “The. Page. Where. Is. It?”

Veronica simply sighed. “In the book. The room behind me. Now can you PLEASE get this piece of shit off of me?”

Lori acquiesced and pulled the gun off of Veronica. As much as Lori didn’t want to admit it, Veronica was right. The gun was now a piece of shit. Lori had no idea how to repair the gun, and without the ability to fire bullets, it was essentially a massively expensive novelty item.

The book sat on some sort of pedestal, closed. It was fancy, almost literally glowing with energy. It drew Lori to it like a magnet, begging to be touched, to be read, to be handled like a text written by the Gods themselves.

But when she finally did touch the book, it snapped open by itself, pages fluttering as if wind blew through them, until they finally rested on a page that had Lori’s name written on it. Confused, Lori reached out to pick up the book, and a jolt of energy shot through her, sending her down in a collapsing heap to the floor.

Minutes passed. When she finally stood up, she was breathing heavily, shocked and confused. She opened the door to where Veronica was and saw that it was empty, with only a second, hidden door open to explain her departure. On the ground, broken, was Inferno.

Except, Lori knew, it wasn’t broken. The sound she had heard was one she had encountered multiple times out in the shooting yard at the base. It sounded so much worse than it actually was. Inferno was tough. It would take a few hours, but it would be an easy fix.

She knew this. She had done it several times before.

So why didn’t she know it only a few minutes ago?

Lori stared back at the room she had just been in, back at the book she had just touched. From this distance, it was easy to see that the page that had opened up to her was now blank, empty. Had she gotten the information from the book? That didn’t make any sense, there was no way she could have simply forgotten such important, yet basic, knowledge.

And if she had somehow had this taken from her, Lori thought as she went down the secret stairs that seemed to lead out of the tower, what else had been lost to her? And how could she get it back?
Once Dead OCT 2 Round 1 Part 2
:icononce-dead-oct:
end of round one submission

Round 1 Part 0: variablenature.deviantart.com/…
Round 1 Part 1: variablenature.deviantart.com/…
Round 1 Part 2: Here!
Round 2?: Will be here if needed!
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Lori woke up early, about half an hour after sunrise. The alarm she had set blared loudly, buzzing twice before she quickly silenced it. She slowly rose, stretching out her arms and legs to help wake herself up, turning on the lamp on the bedside table when she was finished.

As she finally got off the bed and headed off to the bathroom to shower and brush her teeth, moving carefully out of the way of the spider webs that her introductory note had warned her about, she couldn’t help but think how boring this hotel was.

When she had talked with VN, she had expected this tournament to be something that would happen quickly. That she would have to get ready to fight for every inch, rely on every single bit of training she had done, all of the strength and endurance she had gained from being in the Army. She wasn’t too fazed by the…uniqueness, to say the least, of some of the other beings she had encountered. Hell, most of them were human or close enough to not really be a bother. Even the ones that clearly weren’t were things she could handle.

But the waiting, the lack of anything at all happening, that was her biggest worry.

Whatever Veronica and the rest of the Hotel’s management were doing, it didn’t seem like it would be recent. Most of the other guests seemed to be keeping to themselves, with a few of the more kind-hearted or adventurous ones trying to talk with their soon-to-be competitors.

But after a week of nothing but shrugs from Barlow, curses from Veronica, non-commital mutterings from the twins Eli and Illi, and maniacal laughter from the strange tower, Lori was tense.

She hated not knowing what was happening. No real guidance, no plan, no anything.

Once Lori had finished her shower and cleaned herself up, she put on some clothes and went out for a jog. The same as she had the past several days. A routine to help keep her mind focused on what was important: winning whatever this tournament was supposed to be.

Not all the soldiers in the Blue Tiger Battalion that were her direct responsibility as CO.

Not the man she loved and the child she treated like her own flesh and blood.

Breathe, Lori. Breathe in and out. In. Then out. You can do this. They aren’t gone forever. You can bring them back. You WILL bring them back. Lori focused on running her usual route through the hotel, taking care to stay safely away from the strangely dangerous rainbow-colored lake and the forest on the outskirts of the property.

After making a few laps, she found herself in front of the administration area, hungry and leaning against the wall to take a few breaths. Barlow should have opened up the dining area by now, making breakfast for any of the guests who weren’t doing it themselves. Lori, however, made it her business to eat there as much as possible. Barlow was, at the very least in name, an organizer for this tournament, and she wanted every single opportunity she could get in order to ask questions.

“Well hello there, Ms. Nedalph,” he said politely as she entered the hall. Lori raised her hand and waved in acknowledgement. “Menu’s next to the door.”

Lori could see the pancakes being cooked from where she stood and smiled. Her favorite food, might be a good omen. “How are things going?” she asked.

“Alright, I suppose,” the dwarf replied. “Things are going about as well as one might expect. We haven’t had a lot of people messing with the spider webs anymore, thank goodness.” Lori nodded at that. When she had first seen the note specifically mention not damaging or bothering the spiders and their webs, she thought it was some sort of compulsive behavior. After seeing the size of some of the spiders, one of seemed about twelve feet long, Lori understood the need for caution.

Even if the giant spider had been remarkably polite and showed her how to fix the shower head.

“That’s good at least,” Lori replied. “Oh, and three pancakes for me, please.” Barlow picked them up with a spatula and slid them onto the plate, covering them with a fair amount of syrup. “So…” she began, making sure to pick her words carefully to avoid seeming nosy, “anything major coming up soon?”

“Besides my skilled cooking?” Barlow joked. “Well, not many things, to be honest. Veronica keeps saying that something will be happening soon, but she’s had a lot to deal with the past few days.”

“A lot of people have been coming in,” Lori noted, nodding in agreement with Barlow. “How many people are going to be in this Hotel? Every day it seems like there are eight new groups of people showing up.”

“Well, after tomorrow, that number’s going to get cut,” Barlow mentioned off-handedly. Lori stopped and focused in on Barlow and what he just said. He had just realized the implications of what he said and turned to Lori. “Just…she won’t be taking in more people, you see? We’re…we’re running out of rooms.” He let out a half-hearted chuckle, and went back to his business cooking.

“Is it starting tomorrow?” Lori asked confidently. “Is this tournament actually going to happen tomorrow?” She waited for Barlow to answer. “Barlow, you can’t just hide that sort of information! People need to know about this!”

“Look, I don’t know any more than you do,” Barlow admitted. “All I know is Veronica is planning something tomorrow.” Lori kept glaring at him until he sighed. “I’ll do my best to inform everyone else. But she’s had me running around for days. The fish in the lake keep ripping out the trees, and we need to keep putting them back in.”

Lori nodded, thinking through what she just learned. “Thank you so much, Barlow,” she replied. “And thanks for the pancakes,” she added, before taking a seat and beginning her meal.





Inferno was sitting on the small table in the living room area of her bungalow, opened up and exposed, showing off all of its interior workings. Lori was kneeling down, inspecting the mechanics of the Minigun, with what small amount of tools she had organized carefully on the floor beside her. She had had to scrounge up what she could to even have the bare essentials, but ensuring that her main weapon was in top condition was her biggest concern. She had no idea what tomorrow might bring, and Lori knew that the less that she left up to chance, the more she could predict and plan a path to victory.

So far, everything about Inferno looked to be in good condition. The changes that had been made to it seemed limited to the addition of the shield part, as well as the visibility that VN had added to the shield. The weapon was noticeably heavier from that, but not so much that it would be a great hassle to maneuver around the Hotel with it. The firing mechanism seemed to remain the same, albeit with minor adjustments to handle to added weight.

Lori recalled the years she had spent with the Battallion, and all the time she had gone through the various iterations of Inferno, and made minute adjustments, tweaking one piece just so, making the handles easier to hold on to, and ensuring that the bullet chambers were all properly aligned, plus a thousand other things that could be improved in almost unnoticeable ways. She smiled as her small changes happened. The people who had originally designed Inferno, the ones who made the GFB-XX7, they had something that was amazing.

But her tiny changes, adding up to make something even better than before, made it HER Inferno.

She finally got ready for bed, washing off the dirt from the day and soon fell asleep, not noticing the small little spiders eagerly gathering above her bed, following Mistress Veronica’s orders.
Re: Black Box/Hotel Questions
From: crazyshiro
To: VariableNature

I’m going to state this as plainly as I can for you, Nature.

You are not going to be able to get into the hotel.

Hell, I can’t even get into the hotel, and even if I could I wouldn’t want to. I told you about all the insanity and nonsense that happened with Legs, right? The shit that went down there? And hell, let’s throw in all the other creators that decided that the hotel would be their own personal playground, can you imagine how everything went to hell at light speed?

I have washed my hands of all of that. Veronica wants the hotel now, she can damn well keep it. If I never have to even MENTION it ever again, that would just make me happy.

Hell, it boggles my mind that you actually had the balls to see your character off to the hotel in the first place! From what you told me, she had every right to kick your ass. How you got off so easily, I have no idea, but that’s not the point here.

What IS the point is that she has to win on her own. You stay out of it.

Cheers Nature






Re: Black Box/Hotel Questions
From: VariableNature
To: crazyshiro

Alright, alright. Fine. I didn’t mean to sound pushy.

I just….look. Lori’s almost literally the second character I ever really consider to be “my own”. Not just like “OC plz don’t steal” but ACTUALLY MADE. I’ve been SUPER frustrated that I haven’t done anything at all with her since I was 18. So…yeah.

I care about her. Hell, ALL of my characters I care about. I mean, hearing about the Hotel actually being a real, legit thing? BLEW MY FUCKING MIND. The actual ability to interact with your creations…isn’t that basically what ANY and EVERY creator wants? Can you even imagine the potential?

Also, I totally agree with you about actually meeting Lori. Bad, bad, SCARY idea on my part. But worth it.

Getting somewhat back on point, fine. I promise I will not do any super sketchy stuff or even normal, boring stuff with the Hotel and the characters in it. I do, however, have a few experiments that I want to test with the Black Boxes. Problem is, I’m a complete and total noob :(

I’m sure you’ve got all kinds of notes and stuff about Black Boxes. I’m trying to see if I can enter, for lack of a better term, other ones that I have? Or do I only have one? Is it one for each individual character, or do all of the characters I have ever made get into a HUGE Black Box?

I’m doing my best to try and figure this stuff out. Help please?

Thanks!
VN




Re: Black Box/Hotel Questions
From: crazyshiro
To: VariableNature

Ok, that stuff I CAN help you with. I’ve attached some notes and stuff that I scanned to my computer when I was figuring out all this stuff.

Kinda curious about these experiments, though. Let me know what you’re scheming ^w^




Re: Black Box/Hotel Questions
From: VariableNature
To: crazyshiro

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!

As for the experiments….I’ll tell you what I’ve got when I know I have something to get. But trust me, if my theory is right….

I’ll let you be the first to know!

Thanks again!
VN
Once Dead OCT2 Round 1 Part 0
What's VN planning?
:icononce-dead-oct:

Previous Round (Audition): variablenature.deviantart.com/…
Round 1 Part 0: Here!
Round 1 Part 1: variablenature.deviantart.com/…
Round 1 Part 2: variablenature.deviantart.com/…
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Lori Nedalph Character Info Sheet by VariableNature
Lori Nedalph Character Info Sheet

So....this is the character I'm going to be auditioning for the second season of Once Dead OCT. MAJOR MAJOR PROPS to :iconcrazyshiro: for drawing her for me. Man, this is a character I've been meaning to use for a while in SOMETHING. Here's hoping everyone likes her!

If you have any questions or comments, please let me know and I'll get back to you!



Name: Lori Nedalph

Age: 35

Occupation: Lieutenant Colonel of the Royal Durvandian Army, Head of the 24th Special Assault and Testing Battalion (more colloquially known as the “Blue Tiger Battalion”)

Gender: Female

Species: Human

Height: 5’8”

Weight: 141 lbs.

Hair: Black, cut short.

Eyes: Brownish-Gray

Skin Color: Medium-dark brown

Body Type: Somewhat muscular

Other Notes: Has a tattoo along her right arm of a blue tiger sitting up and roaring, which she received when she first joined the Battalion. It goes from her shoulder to her elbow.

Standard Outfit: “Casual” Military Training uniform, with boots and cap. The top of the uniform, if unbuttoned, reveals a plain white, long-sleeved t-shirt.

Do you have permission to kill this character?: Yes, and I wish you the best of luck. Just make sure she goes down swinging, that’s all I ask.

 

History: Born to a military family in the Royal Republic of Durvandia, Lori Nedalph joined the Royal Military Academy at age eighteen and, over the four years she studied there, proved herself as one of the rising stars in her class, regularly getting top marks in her classes and rarely performing outside of the top six members of her grade. At her graduation, she was selected, along with her close friend and rival Jackson Katona, to join the high-profile and (in)famous 24th Special Assault and Testing Battalion. The 24th was designed to gather talented and bright members of all branches of the armed forces and be a testing ground for potential weapons that could be more widely used in the future. The R&D people work as designers and builders for the various weapons, while the soldiers themselves are able to demonstrate how effective (or in-effective, more often than not) they would actually be. Many of these weapons are very high-tech and top-secret, and allow the 24th to operate with a level of independence next to unheard of in the rest of the Royal Durvandian Army. As she continued to work in the 24th, she slowly climbed up the ranks of command, eventually receiving the rank of Lieutenant Colonel and command of the Battalion, with her second-in-command being Katona.

 

Personality: A military brat, and a graduate of the Royal Republic of Durvandia’s top Military Academy, Lori has a very healthy respect for authority and order. She is very much a “lawful good” type of person, expecting others to follow the rules and standards, in particular the people she views as her superiors. Lori does her best to try and set such an example for the soldiers under her, however there have been noted (albeit rare) instances of her losing her composure with her rage becoming quite legendary amongst the newer members of the battalion.

 

Likes: Army, her primary weapon “Inferno” as well as any other types of firearms, her fiancé and soon-to-be step-child, pancakes, her pet ferret Issac

Dislikes: Disorder and insubordination, dark chocolate, extremely windy weather, faulty machinery (especially if there were other, better ways that could have prevented a breakdown)

Fighting Style/Weapons:  

  • Primary weapon: GFB-XX7 MiniGun, more colloquially referred to as “Inferno” for its firepower. It comes attached with a shield that is able to be pulled out from underneath the gun, while still attached to the gun proper, in order to protect the shooter holding the weapon. Should she be holding the weapon while in close-quarters, it is possible for her to swing it around like a large, unwieldy club, but due to its size, weight, and potential for weapon damage, she prefers not to do this.

  • Close Quarters Weaponry: The NY8 (basically a modern-day Beretta M9), and a combat knife, both of which she is very well-trained to handle.

  • Close Quarters Combat: Close quarters, hand-to-hand combat was one of Lori’s weaker areas, although she makes up for technique with strength.

Strengths:

  • Great physical strength and endurance: Lori is very strong and makes it a point to stay in great physical condition. She may just be human, but she is more than capable of handling herself in a fight, especially with her punches (carrying around a heavy Minigun works as a great work-out for upper body strength.

  • Weapons training: She’s been around weapons since she was a child, having been born into a military family, living in army bases as a child, and having served in the Army for years, rising to the rank of Lieutenant Colonel. She knows how to handle weapons carefully and properly, as well as how to care for them and repair them, if need be. Granted, the more exotic weapons might take a much longer time to figure out how to use properly, but she can manage.

  • Leadership and Planning: Rising to being the leader of the 24th meant having training in how to actually BE an effective leader.

  • Survival Training: A core part of Lori’s training was the ability to survive for extended periods of time with limited resources and having to adapt to her surroundings. Identifying the differences between edible and poisonous fruit, basic first aid in the field, etc., were are parts of such training.

  • Bullet Proof Shield: One of the positives of “Inferno” is a riot-shield attachment on the outer-casing of the weapon, which rotates underneath the gun when not pulled out. When it is pulled out, it is capable of stopping and deflecting gunfire, protecting Lori from people trying to shoot her.

  • Patience: You can’t rise in the Army without being willing to take a lot of nonsense. Lori’s been around enough that she can just let enough of it wash over her. But she still does have a tipping point, it’s just farther away than other peoples’. And when it’s reached…..

 

Weaknesses:

  • Standard Human: No magic spells, no superpowers. Standard vanilla human abilities and weaknesses in terms of the supernatural.

  • Overspecialization: When a person has a Minigun at their disposal, they are going to want to use that Minigun as much as possible. Lori is no exception to this rule. While she will still have the presence of mind to bring her pistol and combat knife, she will focus primarily on using the “Inferno”, even in situations where it might not be the best option. She very much considers it “hers”, despite it technically being a prototype that is still in testing before being sent into production proper.

  • “Inferno” can break down: It is, after all, still a prototype. It overheats, it can stall, and it occasionally needs a few slaps to properly work. It can, and possibly will, break down in the middle of a fight, and that will leave Lori open to attack until she either performs a quick fix on the gun, or she starts to use something else.

  • Combat Weaknesses: “Inferno” is a Minigun. They have a knockback. The project itself was basically scrapped until Lori was able to develop a stance and show that she can fire the weapon without falling back twenty feet on her ass. This means that she HAS to remain stationary in order to fire the gun; otherwise she will injure herself and potentially damage the weapon. This also means that, should she be attacked from behind, Lori would be basically defenseless.

  • Rage: Lori may have a high tolerance, but when it breaks, it breaks HARD. Tactics at this point just fly out the window, planning gets scrapped, teamwork thrown into the trash; when she’s angry, she wants someone to HURT and by HER HANDS. She becomes so focused that she develops tunnel vision to her surroundings.



EDIT: So, for pre-round stuff, I had to include some things that were taken away from Lori. A few things were a bit hard (namely the "powers" section), but here they are for anyone who needs to know!

Stuff that Veronica ends up taking away from Lori due to her magic spiders:

 

Powers:


  • That bullet-proof glass on the shield part of Inferno? The one that VN gave Lori just before he headed off to the hotel? Gone. She’s basically blind firing at full-protection. Full shield means lack of vision. I understand that this isn’t a “power”, per se, but since her only “power” is her choice in weaponry, that’s what’s getting changed.

 

Memories:


  • Memories of her fiancé and soon-to-be step-son. Bye-bye love of her life and child she treats like her own flesh and blood!

  • How to perform a proper, in-the-field style fix if anything on Inferno breaks down. Something happens to it, it will be busted. Given that it’s still in testing stages, that could happen very easily. POST ROUND 1 EDIT: Lori has regained this knowledge after scaling the Tower in Round 1.

  • She no longer remembers being in charge of the “Blue Tiger Battalion”, the 24th Special Assault and Testing. As far as she can recall, she’s just another soldier in the group, albeit fairly high-ranking and serving under the Old Duck (the former CO of the Battalion).

  

Persona:


  • Control over her Anger. Yeah, Lori’s going to be much, MUCH easier to set off. She no longer has very good control or patience, just a lot of RAGE.


Loading...
So....it's been a while since I made a journal entry.

Straight to the point: A while ago I joined the second season of :icononce-dead-oct: and used a character I haven't even touched since High School, Lori Nedalph.

I really like Lori. She was one of the first characters that I seriously tried to write something with, even if it did end up as a collosial failure. And with the new season of Once Dead, I figured that this would be the perfect time to re-use her.

So I bring Lori out of "retirement", change a few things about her (most notably changing her ethnicity), fleshed out her backstory a bit more, and then shipped her off to compete.

That's where I got stuck.

See, in the first season of Once Dead, the character I used, Amy Tolson, was one I had actually worked on for a bit, but just hadn't WRITTEN stuff for in a long time. But for this one, I just couldn't really determine her personality as quickly as I wanted. Sure I was able to sneak by the first round, but I just had trouble really CONNECTING with Lori, figuring out her voice, etc. etc.

Plus, having to change what personality I knew she had after getting her memories/abilities stolen by Veronica? Kind of a MAJOR wrench in the works.

The long and short of it is that I fucked up. I fucked up HARD. I procrastinated. I put off writing. Even when I tried to write, I threw it out because it wasn't "good enough", even though I knew the deadline was looming. I thought that I could just slam something out at the last minute, like I've often done in these OCT's, and it would be enough to make something happen.

I was wrong. Instead, I've let myself down and shown that I'm just kind of narcissistic and over-estimating my own abilities.

I'd like to take this moment to apologize to some people:

To the judges of :icononce-dead-oct:

:iconcrazyshiro: :iconburoe: :iconaegypius-x: :iconwithaquillinmyhand: and :icondeadberry:

I apologize to you all for not performing in my duties as a competitor in an OCT. I wish I could blame some sinister external force that prevented me from writing, but it was just me. I accept that I will be disqualified and eliminated because of this.

To my opponent :iconanthropomorchicanin:

I wish you the best of luck in future rounds, and can't wait to see what you write. I'm sorry I couldn't come up with something in time.

And to anyone, be they a part of the Once Dead community (for lack of a better word), or just someone who happens to like what I read:

I'm sorry I let you down.

There is, however, one last thing I CAN submit, if you guys want. While I was certainly procrastinating on this round, I did have a rough idea for what I wanted the overall story of my submissions to be, my meta-plot if you will. I'll probably give a VERY abbreviated version of that and post it up here, so if anyone was interested in seeing what I wanted to do, and maybe wants to shamelessly steal it, I can post it this Friday.

I wish everyone the best of luck!

VN out
  • Mood: Shame
  • Listening to: Rock Music
  • Reading: Saga
  • Watching: Various Anime
  • Playing: haven't played video games in a while
  • Eating: Food
  • Drinking: Water

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VariableNature's Profile Picture
VariableNature

Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
Favourite genre of music: Rock and Roll
Favourite style of art: Writing!
Operating System: PC
Shell of choice: Blue Shell, duh!
Favourite cartoon character: If we include manga, Nao from Liar Game
Personal Quote: "Where's my stick? Someone needs to get whacked!"
Interests

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:iconslicer37:
Slicer37 Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2014
You should do rankings of SFC13 when it ends, I'm sure they'll be very indepth and insightful knowing your posting style!
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:iconvariablenature:
VariableNature Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I might actually do that. Should be a nice change of pace. Will need to re-read the whole season multiple times to be absolutely sure of stuff, though.

Thanks for the idea!
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:iconslicer37:
Slicer37 Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2014
lol my ranking is totally set at this point, and my opinions are not exactly the norm this season so ^_^.

no problem!
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:iconcrazyshiro:
crazyshiro Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2014  Professional General Artist
Thank you for the :+fav:! :heart:
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:iconslicer37:
Slicer37 Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014
do you do fanfic? I feel like you'd be good at it lol
Reply
:iconvariablenature:
VariableNature Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I actually don't. Part of the reason is because I prefer working on wholly original stuff that I've created, but it's mostly because I'm too worried about my own personal feelings about certain characters influencing the story, rather than what they were actually like in the canon proper.

Like, I may absolutely hate a character, and in a fanfic I write involving them, their negative traits will most likely get more emphasis. However, that would mean that the good/interesting/engaging/relatable parts of their personality get muted or even outright removed, and I won't be portraying them accurately. I've read a LOT of fanfics, and my favorite ones were always the ones that best maintained the way the characters from the show or books or movies or comics thought and acted. I just don't trust my own judgment and ability to overcome personal bias towards them. It's also why I like doing OCT's, since characters' personality et cetera are all clearly defined for everyone so that there aren't any issues (and even then I still get nervous about mis-portraying other peoples' characters).

I appreciate the compliment, though!
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:iconslicer37:
Slicer37 Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014
Lol I totally understand where you're coming from. To do a good fanfic you really have to get the *essence* of the characters, and most people don't, or change them to fit what they're trying to push.

But no problem, you seem like a really interesting guy :)
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:iconfhyeah1:
FHYeah1 Featured By Owner May 29, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the watch!! :hug:
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:iconlight-trainer:
Light-Trainer Featured By Owner May 29, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the watch!
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:iconcrazyshiro:
crazyshiro Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2014  Professional General Artist
Thank you for the :+devwatch:! :heart:
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